That’s right folks. You read that right. A woman whose car wouldn’t start after a quick trip to Walmart, decided to take matters into her own hands. 

I mean it ain’t like she was gonna keep it. 

Or was she? 

So at about 4:00 a.m. in Clarksville Tennessee, a woman named Jaimie Taylor decided that she wanted some snacks. So she cranks up her car and heads to the local Walmart for Doritos and Jelly beans. The jelly beans were mine and the chips are hers. Anyway, she’s pissed because when she gets to the parking lot she discovers that her Car won’t start and she needed to get home quickly to try to get some help. 

Now I don’t recall how fast those carts go but ummm, I’m usually annoyed with them in the store. Old people are always in My way! 

So Jaimie takes the cart and proceeds to drive home. Probably WEST because that’s where the living Is BEST. A female officer named, oh I forgot, it doesn’t really matter because CLEARLY this story is about me, sees her and attempts to stop her, even going as far as flashing her lights. But that didn’t stop the slow driver from her route. Jaimie was oblivious to the officer or the flashing emergency lights. She was like a mile away from the store. Which in my opinion is pretty damn good. 

Except for that fact that she was riding along the shoulder of the road at 4 a.m. Lol 

The officer apparently got tired of driving behind her and decided to do a foot pursuit. 

She eventually was able to catch up to Taylor. 

Poor baby. Jaimie Taylor had outstanding warrants against her for driving on a suspended or revoked license, simple possession and not using a child restraint. 

She was booked on a $15,500 bail. 

Lol look Jaimie I’m on your side. You were being creative and I commend you for that. That was very innovative and resourceful. 

How did she get caught? 

Taking too long to get home with my jelly beans!! So I called 911 to send a search and recovery team to find my beans and they noticed her snails pace ass rolling down the street. 

I told them to do what they wanted with her, just don’t damage my jelly beans. Especially not the black ones. They are My favorite.