You know I’m starting to realize a lot of people don’t like me. And that’s because I’m an I Told You So person. I really am and I can’t help it. You see when I write a story or I share a story that’s in the media, it’s not just about giving the news. It’s about teaching a lesson. At least it is for me. What is the point of copying and pasting a story or repeating the same information that you’ve gotten on other sites? That’s stupid. There are hundreds of stories out there with the same content. I want to teach you something. I want to challenge you and make you think and make you consider changing if you’re fucked in the head.

A lot of women have gone through abusive relationships. I know I have. And if you actually read my blogs in full instead of the popular stories, you’d know that.

Rachael wasn’t powerless. None of us are. She’s an attractive woman who would have easily caught the eye of a good man. But what is it about her that made her choose to stay with him? He poured acid on her tattoo. He beat her. Threatened her life constantly. And like a loyal dog, she returned.

Finally she decides to break free and that’s great. But the damage is done. She has already taught him how to treat her. He has grown accustomed to kicking her ass. So when she leaves he goes through sort of a withdrawal. He needs to get his daily fix of confidence by insulting and assaulting her. But she’s not there and he grows angrier and angrier.

What is he to do with all of that anger? He has to channel it somewhere and she’s been a loyal customer. So he aims it directly at her. Because she has proven that she can take it and she can stand the test of time.

 I get so tired of hearing don’t blame the victim. But really whose fault is it if you decide to stay in an abusive relationship? That’s not my fault, that’s not your mother’s fault, that’s not your children’s fault, that’s not your economic statuses fault. It’s YOUR choice.

 My ex-husband was extremely abusive especially during the time I was pregnant. Mind you I’ve been married twice. So not my most recent marriage, but when I was 21 I got married. Anyway I didn’t know how I would get out of that situation. I really didn’t have anything. We had had a house built together and we shared one daughter and I had my son from a previous relationship. But the abuse got worse and worse. I swear this man hated me. The marriage did not last for two years because I packed up my shit and took my kids leaving everything behind. I got the fuck out of there. His payback for me leaving is he took our daughter and hid her. I never saw her again.

So when I tell you it can be done. It can be done. It does not matter the circumstances. You have to get out of there alive and the sooner you leave the better. Because the abuse doesn’t get better it gets worse.

A lot of women feel like ” What if I fight back?  then technically I’m not being abused.” Listen to me I will kick somebody’s ass. I didn’t just stand there and let him hit me. I fought back. But imagine being 7 months pregnant having to fight your husband. Nobody has time for that.

 His problems were his problems and I’m nobody’s punching bag. So you either stay and hope and pray that he will change, or you get the fuck out of Dodge.

We need to empower each other and support each other in times of crisis. I don’t know if she had friends but if she did I’m certain that they told her to leave. I’m certain that her mother and her father or her sister and her brother told her to get out of that relationship. So she had all the power and the control in the world. She just did not know it, or she chose not to utilize it. Some people like being the victim. That’s just what it is. It’s a harsh truth but some women like it rough. It seems like that’s all they understand. And when you accompany that with drug addiction or substance abuse it makes for an extremely tumultuous relationship.

Rachael deserved a better life. But Rachael got the life she thought she deserved. Something in her made her think that she couldn’t do better than him.

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Federal officials have found the body of Rachael Madison, the woman who vanished while jogging along a Florida beach last week after fleeing her estranged and allegedly abusive husband, PEOPLE confirms.

On Friday night, unidentified human remains were found in a remote area on the side of a highway in Knoxville, Tennessee. Officials announced the discovery Saturday, believing the remains belonged to the 44-year-old, though the identity was not confirmed until Monday.

Madison’s husband, Jarvis Madison, was arrested Friday morning, on an arrest warrant from Indiana State Police, for criminal confinement charges. Following his arrest, authorities acquired information that led them to the body’s location more than 200 miles away, according to the FBI’s statement.

It is unclear whether Jarvis has an attorney or has entered a plea to his charges. He currently remains in custody in Indiana. Neither he nor Rachael’s family could be reached for comment.

She went missing on Nov. 27 during a jog along the beach in Ormond-by-the-Sea, Florida, Volusia County Sheriff’s Office spokesman Andrew Gant previously told PEOPLE.

“The thoughts and prayers of everyone in the FBI are with Ms. Madison’s family, and we remain committed to finding answers through our ongoing investigation,” said Charles P. Spencer, Special Agent in Charge of the FBI Jacksonville Division, in a statement obtained by PEOPLE.

Rachael’s Family Alleges Abuse

Rachael’s aunt, Thelma Newsom, told police Rachael moved to Florida days before her disappearance to get away from Jarvis, according to a Volusia County police report obtained by PEOPLE.

On Nov. 14, Jarvis allegedly held Rachael hostage at gunpoint and fired a gun at her after finding out she wanted to leave him, the police report states.

According to the report, citing Newsom, Rachael was covered in scars from her husband’s alleged abuse — including one on her back, after Jarvis allegedly poured acid on a tattoo, and several on her neck, after Jarvis allegedly cut her with a knife.

Days before Rachael vanished, Jarvis frequently called her and her family members, threatening to kill her if she did not come back to him, the police report alleges. On the day of her disappearance, Newsom claimed Jarvis tried one last time to reach his wife, 30 minutes before she went for her run.

The couple were homeless and lived between motels in Indiana, Kentucky and Ohio, police say. They sometimes lived in Jarvis’s 2011 silver Honda Pilot.